On the edge.

Tomorrow I turn 18. 

Really? Because I've spent all my life wondering about this. I've waited and pondered, questioned and guessed. I never thought I would be this girl the day before this birthday. I thought with 18 came knowing and understanding. I'm so far from knowing all that I want to know. It's such a shock, because I've always thought I would look older and seem older. The girl I see in the mirror looks young and naive. Yet, she's on the edge of adulthood. Today I'm considered an adolescent, tomorrow, I'll be an adult. Today I'm unable to sign my own permission slips and get a tattoo. Tomorrow, I can. 

Yet I won't be any smarter. It's just another day of life. I'm on the edge of a different experience, but I've got the same head to go along with it. Life keeps going. Laws remain laws, rules stay settled. Tomorrow, Madeline Claire will be an "adult" but she doesn't want to be. I know another day won't change my essence or the soul inside, yet there are things that will change. I hate change. I like being grounded. Change is bittersweet and sentimental, sometimes I don't want to face that. But here I am, so it's time to face it. Too soon or not, here I come. 

My birthday, 2003, 9 years old.

Senior Photo, 2012, 17 years old.

xoxo, 

Madeline Claire